Know that I cry, inside out.

adamseden @ 2009-04-21T12:56:00

2009-04-21T17:57:10Z

Adam Cast Forth by Jorge Luis Borges

Was there a Garden or was the Garden a dream?
Amid the fleeting light, I have slowed myself and queried,
Almost for consolation, if the bygone period
Over which this Adam, wretched now, once reigned supreme,

Might not have been just a magical illusion
Of that God I dreamed. Already it's imprecise
In my memory, the clear Paradise,
But I know it exists, in flower and profusion,

Although not for me. My punishment for life
Is the stubborn earth with the incestuous strife
Of Cains and Abels and their brood; I await no pardon.

Yet, it's much to have loved, to have known true joy,
To have had -- if only for just one day --
The experience of touching the living Garden.

The Hospital

2008-05-12T02:55:06Z

Adam Laid on the hospital bed, his eyes half open, watching the people filing past the window in his room. Sometimes they would come in and ask him questions, and other times he would just past on by.
     His was a boring wait. He did a lot of waiting in the Legion and it nearly drove him mad. This waiting was even worse, waiting for some machine to tell him he was okay, or if he wasn't.
     Some man who had gone through a lot of schooling was going to come in and tell him that he had read all the tests and now knew when he was going to die.

Oh, he knew he was going to die, everyone did it. Some people denied it, and others embraced it. Adam had become indifferent to it, just doing what needed to be done to prolong the inevitable. For himself, for Jimmy, and his mother. People he loved, people he wanted to cling to, who, if he could save, meant he could save himself.

The worst thing about waiting is the helpless feeling that went along with it. He couldn't move from the the bed for fear of ripping his stitches. He couldn't sit up or try and do things on his own. Jimmy had to help him with everything, and for the first time in a long time, he felt worthless and truly scared.

If he could just get out of bed, get up and move on his own - get away from the hospital, everything would be okay. It was a mantra he kept repeating to himself, because, deep down he believed that he could heal on his own, he could do a better job taking care of himself then this hospital.

If he could get out of bed there would be no cancer, there would be no more tumours, and he would be able to go up to Vermont with Jimmy. No more pain, no more fear, and no more threat of Death. He would leave the hospital and escape from everything.

The door opened and Heidi and mel came shuffling in, their eyes down cast, their posture filled with nervous fear. He knew that look well, how many times had he felt the same way when walking into his own mother's hospital room?

He smiled, trying to reasure them, and when he sat up to greet them, Jimmy moved forward to fix the pillows behind his back. Mel moved forward first and offered him the bouquet of flowers she probably perchased down at the hospital gift shop. The looked beat up, carnations were wilting and the baby's breath was beginning to turn yellow and brown from lack of water. To Adam they were the most beautiful thing in the world, and he thanked her, bringing them to his mouth so he could inhale their fragrance.

Setting the flowers aside, he received a kiss and a hug from each of the girls, as he told them how happy he was to see them. Asking them about their days, he sat back and watched the girls glance at each other before Heidi began to speak. She was able to make it through her tale, talking about school, her friends, and even her crush before Mel started.

Mel didn't even get past what she was doing in school before she broke down, crying she gripped him and the hospital blankets, crying and snotting into the sterile blanket. Her father gently rubbed her back, as Adam stroked her hair and frowned deeply.

     "I don't want you to die!" She gasped and sobbed out, looking up at him with red rimmed eyes.

     "Baby, I am not going to die, I am just a little banged up. A few scratches isn't going to keep me down, you know that, sweetheart." He murmured, her fingers combing through her tangled hair. Deep down, he had no idea if he even believed those words. It didn't matter, his life, his death, and that was really no concern for a little girl.

When Mel calmed down, their conversation stayed light and upbeat, trying to keep from any of them to break down and start crying once again. They talked for about an hour when a doctor came in and looked the family over. "Time for some blood work, and another X-ray, Adam." He smiled, but it never reached his eyes, it never did.

Adam gave each of the girls a kiss good-bye, whispering how much he loved them against their cheeks before they pulled away and walked out of the room. Jimmy gave him a lingering kiss and told him that he would be back just as soon as the girls were taken care of.

Nodding, he sat back and smiled at them as they left the room. Alone, he sat back to wait.

If || Rudyard Kipling

2008-05-06T06:19:03Z

"If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; . . . If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two impostors just the same . . . Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it."

-- Rudyard Kipling

Nat King Cole || Stardust

2008-05-04T19:06:16Z

Dance with me James?

for muse_shuffle May Disc 1.5.11 The cure

2008-05-03T02:36:07Z

Monday you can fall apart // Tuesday, Wednesday break my heart // Thursday doesn't even start // It's Friday I'm in love -- The Cure 'Friday I'm in love'

It seemed like they were swinging back and forth on a huge pendulum attached to a very large clock. One moment they were happy, content together, and then the next they were arguing. These arguments usually ended with blows, and for the most part, Adam tried to hold himself back, but as his various bruises grew, his patience diminished. He wanted so badly to please the other man, but everything he said or did seemed to come out wrong.

Soon he fell into a bit of a slump, but Adam would never admit that he was depressed. Men didn't get depressed, they were strong, silent and held up those around him, putting themselves last. At least that's what he had been taught, and knowing nothing different, he hid his frustration and feelings of helplessness as best he could. Despite Jimmy's insistence that he talk, Adam grew quiet, everything he tried to say sounded wrong, made him look pitiful.

At moments he wondered why the older man was with him, listing off every horrible quality he had inside his head when he watched the silver haired man sleep. Late at night, when he couldn't sleep, he tried to think of a single good thing that he possessed, that would make James stay with him. In the end he came up empty, feeling completely un-lovable, unredeemable. There was something wrong with him, Jimmy saw it plainly, as did his father. No matter what he did, he came up short. He hoped, he prayed that something would happen, maybe some moment of brilliance that would make him into the man that Jimmy deserved.

Maybe going to prison would be a good thing, at least Jimmy would be free of him then - wouldn't he? Until then, he would hang on, day by day, doing whatever he could to make his lover happy. He would weather the fights, both the verbal and the physical. He would take care of man when he didn't feel well, and kiss him every night they shared the same bed. He would love him and remain faithful, until he was no longer needed.

(357)

for mind_the_muse TEN ways you say I love you, without saying the words

2008-05-03T02:06:46Z

I'm not very good at showing how I care, for some reason my tongue doesn't want to work and I sit there looking like a bloody fool. I know it upsets James, he gets frustrated, and I understand why. I am trying to be better, but these are a few ways I try and say I love you.

10. I try and make sure he has breakfast before he goes to work. I know he likes to look at the sports and news sections of the news paper, so I let him read it before I do.
09. Even though he's not suppose to have red meat, I pretend not to notice when he eats a majority of my Mongolian beef.
08. I rub his back when he gets home from work, I know he gets tired and sore so I try and make him comfortable.
07. Sometimes I send him little notes at work, so he knows I am thinking about him.
06. I play the piano for him, sometimes I sing, because I know that makes him happy.
05. I make sure he takes his medication so he doesn't get sick. I don't want him to end up in the hospital, or ill again.
04. Cover him up with a blanket when he falls asleep on the couch.
03. Get him little gifts when I go out shopping, especially when I see something I think he would like.
02. Do the dishes when it's his turn.
01. Try and do everything in my power to be the man he deserves.

. . . Maybe Bobby's right, that's not love, that's smothering. I'm just not very good at this, am I?

adamseden @ 2008-04-25T19:25:00

2008-04-26T01:26:09Z

He has the best ass ever

For: James

2008-04-18T03:33:39Z

For the_bigshow 2.10 1.G Sunset Blvd.

2008-04-05T20:38:56Z

I finally gathered up Norma Desmond (the cat) to watch Gloria Swanson play Norma Desmond (the actress). I love Sunset Boulevard, I've even seen the Glenn Close musical on Broadway. It's an excellent movie, and even if it was filmed in 1950 I think anyone can easily relate to it. We've all done something that makes us compromise who we really are. Joe Gillis allowed himself to become a kept man for a woman who was so obsessed with the past that she didn't realize what was truly going on around her. In the end, he ends up hating himself and the woman who made him what he was. In the end he ended up floating in a pool, something he always wanted, dead and fodder for reporters.

Gloria Swanson always impressed me, since she was pretty much playing a version of herself on the screen, so was Erich Von Stroheim. Swanson was a silent film actress who, after a few bad movies disappeared from the spotlight. One of her very last movies was directed by Stroheim, who disappeared after that movie too. It's amazing to watch. Billie Wilder works magic with the camera, and adds just the right amount of nostalgia and creepy to the film. Now I am not very creative, or smart when it comes to movies - I am simply one of those people who like what I do, but can't really put it into words.

Still, there is something about Sunset Boulevard that always stuck with me. Maybe I feel too much like Norma Desmond (the actress) washed up and obsolete without even knowing it. Sometimes I know I live in the past, the thoughts about my old man, the what if's when it came to relationships and the Legion. Its hard to face the future, especially knowing that it's going to be really trying.

Ha! Did you know that Buster Keaton is in this too?! Such excellence.

(337)

Iphone update

2008-04-01T14:42:49Z

You know what is NOT funny as an April fools joke? Men in suits banging on your door with bullet proof vests on, with a warrant to search your house and for your arrest.

Just sayin'

ESPECIALLY when they decide to paw through all your unmentionables, and embarrassing ones at that.

For justprompts 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

2008-03-27T06:27:13Z

(Last one, I swear to God, I am going to bed. This of course is a rent boy prompt.)

Adam Krane believes in true love, pulse pounding, stomach fluttering, kisses on your 40th anniversary, true love. Of course, Adam hasn't experienced much of that, if at all, but he still believes in it. He's not sure why, but he does. Maybe it's because it gives him something to hold on to, to work for - because as soon as he falls in love, that's all he'll ever need. That's what Adam Krane believes.

Adam watches old movies in the Chinese movie theater, the one with the sleepy ticket taker, and where you can watch two movies and get stale popcorn for five dollars and fifty cents. It helps him to forget the fact that this is the only meal that he'll get that day, and it's the only place he can sleep without someone hassling him. He watches the black and white movies through half opened eyes, dashing heroes, bad boys that are just good enough that you can cheer for them. Damsels in distress that are just competent enough to take care of themselves. They fall in love in the end, and the scene fades out with them sharing one last, romantic embrace.

He doesn't get that though, he gets the man who started such a big fight that the cops were called, that resulted in Adam getting kicked out of his apartment. There was the man who borrowed Adam's car and totaled it while driving drunk. The lawyer who promised Adam that he would take care of him, that he would love him forever, until Adam found out that he was married with a brand new baby. Still, he hoped the man would come back, somehow find away to have his practice, his wife and his boy. The musician with long fingers and a soulful mouth, he gave Adam syphilis and broke his heart. The blond's accountant friend had a coke habit and when they were pulled over by the cops planted it on Adam.

The college boy never called back after two amazing dates.

Still he believes in love, and one day he won't have to sneak around back to break into the theater when he's to broke to afford tickets. One day he'll have someone to kiss good morning and good night. One day he'll hold hands walking down the street and be happy with who he is and who he's with. When he won't flirt drinks from lonely old men at the bar, when he'll have a shower every day - and he'll find a real job. He'll find someone who is patient, kind, and forgiving of all his faults, of all his pasts sins and indiscretions - and want a future with him.

One day, he'll share a kiss with someone and it will be real. Sooner or later, he'll say 'I love you' to someone, and he'll hear it in return. He'll hear it, and believe it.

Adam Krane is a romantic, and he's okay with that.

(510)

For justprompts. Helpless & Peace

2008-03-27T05:44:04Z

He hated being sick, he hated sweating in the sheets, when his stomach was in knots, when his body was trying to burn away the germs that got him sick in the first place. He hated the helpless feeling that went along with his illness. His body shook, and his head pounded, hands clammy he reached up to pick up the glass of water at his bed stand. Sipping at it, he sagged back on the bed and whimpered. The noise woke his lover, and even though he hated to disturb Jimmy, he was more then happy to feel the fingers in his hair, the washing cloth on his forehead sending a shiver down his spine.

Jimmy didn't say anything, he simply took care of the blond, holding him even though Adam was sure he was disgusting to touch - hot and sweating like he had just run a marathon. The older man didn't complain, didn't roll his eyes or mutter under his breath - he simply puled Adam's head into his lap and stroked his hair until he fell asleep once again.

(193)

First keep the peace within yourself, then you can also bring peace to others. -Thomas a Kempis

            Adam could hear the girls giggling inside Mel's bedroom, they were delighted with Norma, they thought that she was the cutest thing ever. A fact they had told Adam many, many times. They spent all day chasing the kitten around and then taunting her with shoe strings and various home made toys they had come up with for the kitten. He was impressed with their ingenuity in the matter, and he was sure Norma was just thrilled.

He continued down the stairs, pausing at the bottom so he could take some time to watch Jimmy sitting on the couch. He was busy filling out paper work, his feet up on the coffee table, a cold cup of tea next to him as he stared intently at whatever he was working on. The glasses perched on the end of his nose just added to that authoritative look he could pull off so well. Of course it wasn't so cute when Adam thought it was just oh so adorable, walking over to the couch he flopped down next to him and put his head on his lap top.

    "Play with me," he purred. A request that caused Jimmy to roll his eyes and sigh dramatically.

    "Get up, your crushing my work." This time, it was Adam's turn to sigh and he sat up and put his arm around Jimmy's neck and made faces at him as the older man tried to work.

    "Not going to work." The man muttered as he added some more information. Once he was done, Adam picked up Jimmy's hand and put it on his thigh. Jimmy pulled it away and gave a grunt, but Adam did it again, determined. This went on for awhile, until Adam grabbed the laptop and pulled Jimmy into a laughing kiss.

When the silver haired man pulled back, he tried to scowl - snatching the laptop back he growled at the blond upstart. "Do that again, and I'll send you to bed without supper."

Settling down, Adam grinned and rested against his lover's arm, his eyes half open as he listened to the house settle around them. Just when the peace was complete the girls came clomping down stairs, Heidi carrying Norma Desmond. The girls had found some pink fabric and came up with a make shift tutu for the cat.

The two Deakin girls demanded their father's attention, and when he raised his hand and slid off his glasses they performed the ballet de cat. An act that involved Mel humming in between giggles while Heidi moved the cat around to the "music." Norma Desmond, was not pleased. Adam's silence lasted all of a minute, he started to laugh, at first he tried to hide it, then, when it became to much, he broke down. Laughing so hard he was crying, while James Deakins watched the goings on with a stoic demeanor that only crumbed with the corners of his mouth twitched up into a smile - only to disappear.

At the end, Adam was still crying with laughter, and Jimmy was shaking his head. When asked if they liked the performance, all Adam could do was laugh and nod, while Jimmy leveled his blue gaze at the girls.

    "I have never, in my whole time on the force seen such a disturbing display before."

There was a chorus of "Dad!" from both girls, before they let Norma Desmond go and ran to tackle their father. Adam grabbed Heidi, and Jimmy, Mel as they both grunted under their imaginary weight. Now calm, Adam sat back, enjoying the happy laughter of the father and his two daughters. It was a peace that could only come with family, and he was glad that he found it.

(640)

10 question Meme (stolen from EVERYONE)

2008-03-25T23:21:34Z

1) Go HERE to generate 10 random numbers between 1 and 100. Generate a different set of numbers for each character you pick. DO THIS FIRST.

2) Then I will answer the corresponding questions from HERE

Does anyone ever wonder where these bloody things come from?!

Relationship Meme (For James Deakins)

2008-03-25T06:45:48Z

1. Who eats more?
I think this one might be a tie. Though I can be bit of a pig.

2. Who said "I love you" first?
I did, since I am the hopeless romantic.

3. How long have you been together?
Oh, God. A year and a half in high school, and now we've been together almost a year?

4. Who sings better?
I think James has a very wonderful voice.

5. Who's older?
James, of course I don't want to die so I won't tell how old he is.

6. Who's smarter?
He is, by far. I am as dumb as a box of hair.

7. Whose temper is worse?
His, when Jimmy gets cross, EVERYONE knows.

8. Who does the laundry?
We do it, unless we send it out.

9. Who does the dishes?
We do them together, or I'll get them - I tend to have a problem with how people wash the dishes.

10. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?
I do, he sleeps closest to the door. He says its a throw back from when he was living with Angie, being closest to the door to protect her if anything happened - I think that's bloody adorable.

11. Who snores?
We both do, not loud or annoying, though if James is stuffy it can get bad.

12. Whose hair is longer?
Mine, I let mine get a bit wild at times.

13. Who's better with the computer?
Oh, goodness, He probably is, he's always on one.

14. Do you have pets?
OMG we have a kitten! Named Norma Desmond. She is our baby.

15. Who pays the bills?
We pay the bills together.

16. Who cooks dinner?
Who ever feels up to it, usually I do, sometimes we do it together. But most often when he's at work I have dinner ready for him when he gets home.

17. Who drives when you are together?
Oh, I do, I do most of the driving actually. Of course its my car.

18. Who pays when you go out to dinner?
You know, it's odd - we usually trade off and on. He'll pick up the tab one night and then I will.

19. Who is the most stubborn?
Jesus Christ, Jimmy, but far. The Legion taught me to keep at it, but to be flexible, but Jimmy . . . Woo. Wait, I am very stubborn when it comes to cleaning.

20. Who is the first one to admit when they're wrong?
I will, I'm horribly passive. James will admit that he was wrong, but it usually takes a few days.

21. Whose parents do you see more?
Mine, well, my mum. I try and go out and see her on the weekends, and sometimes Jimmy comes along. I met his parents when I was a kid though.

22. Who named your kids?
HA! I picked the name Norma Desmond, but it was Angie and Jimmy who picked the names of the girls. Though we have talked of two legged babies one day.

23. Who kissed who first?
All the way back when we were lads we kissed each other first, we were both nervous but I think Jimmy made the first move. When we got back together, he kissed me first, I usually didn't kiss one night stands - the fact that he did kiss me lead it to me more then a one night stand.

24. Who asked who out?
He did when we were kids (he asked me to his house.)

25. Who dusts the house?
I DO. NO BODY BLOODY DUSTS CORRECTLY. DO NOT CLEAN MY HOUSE.

26. Who's more sensitive?
It depends, I am sensitive about cleaning and my family, and Jimmy can be pretty bloody sensitive about things. Of course I am pretty much a thick clod when it comes to be sensitive to others feelings. So maybe I'm just an asshole.

27. Who cleans the bathroom?
I DO. BATHROOM MUST BE PROPERLY CLEANED.

28. Who has more friends?
I think he does, I only have a select few in New York - he has a lot of work buddies.

29. Who has more siblings?
Jimmy has a brother and a sister. I am an only child.

30. Who wears the pants in the relationship?
*Laughed* We'll after this afternoon - I might.

31. Who’s more sexy?
Those blue eyes, cut body, silver hair? Him, hands down.

32. Who sleeps naked?
II find it bloody impossible to sleep naked, Jimmy sleeps naked. I hate the idea of bed bugs climbing all over my privates. OH DEAR LORD! Have you ever slept without a tent in the jungle?! After that you learn to sleep fully clothed.

33. Who has the craziest ex?
Eeshh. . . Oh, Angie isn't that bad. Mine is pretty fucked up.

34. Who has more money?
I do. Well, for now, until I figure out how I am going to salvage my business.

35. Who has more tattoos?
I do. I have two tattoos, Jimmy has none.

36. Who eats more sweets?
Jimmy has a wonderful sweet tooth, I think it's adorable.

37. Who is closer to their family?
I think it's a tie, Jimmy loves his children, that's very apparent, but I love my mum.

38. Who has the older car?
I think he might, though he has one of those cars from the NYPD, right?

39. Who has bigger dreams?
He does, I think. I have everything I have always dreamed of.

40. Who cries more?
Real men don't cry.

for thetenspot 090. TEN shows Adam Krane watches (or is forced to)

2008-03-24T15:21:40Z

I don't like TV and didn't watch it very much growing up, these are the shows that I remember liking and will watch if they come on tv (except Dora, I have my limits.)

10. Dora the Explorer, this is for Gene's kids when I get roped into baby sitting duty. These children's shows are so completely soul sucking, they just draw you in and leave you an empty shell. TV is of the devil.
09. BBC world news. Since it's geared toward world news I am more fond of it then I am of CNN or FOX, plus it reminds me of home - and listening to their broadcasts on the radio on base.
08. Are you being Served? (reruns) Oh leave me alone, the show was bloody brilliant. I laughed till tears come when they put on the play Punch and Judy.
07. Faulty Towers (reruns), I was never a true fan of Monty Python's Flying Circus. Some of it was just too absurd and abstract for me - but I will never doubt the comic genius of John Cleese.
06. Hex, Now this is a complete guilty pleasure, and I feel like a complete thickie enjoying them - but I suppose everyone needs their secret indulgence.
05. Coupling, heterosexuals are funny.
04. Touching Evil, the British version with Robson Green, not your stupid American rip-off. Why? Because Robson Green is fucking hot.
03. Prime Suspect. Dame Helen Mirren can kick my ass and your ass, so don't even try.
02. CSI: Miami, David Caruso is the luckiest son of a bitch alive. That is all I am saying here.
01. Black Books, irate Irish men are always good for a laugh.

Mmmm Caffeine . . .

2008-03-23T22:40:14Z

Created by OnePlusYou - Free Online Dating

For the_bigshow 2.8. 3.V - Stormy Weather

2008-03-23T04:54:41Z

He was going to kill him. He was going to destroy him and everything he ever cared about. He was sick of all the shit he had to go through in order to please a man he had taken in and loved. He had given him everything, and now he was walking out on him, like Adam was some sort of monster, like everything they had gone through meant nothing.

It wouldn't be hard, Adam never had a problem with eliminating his problems before. That's what he was good at. Getting rid of problems and right now, James Deakins was the biggest problem in the world. He knew the truth about his work, he knew about the drugs, what Adam had to do in order to put a roof over the other man's head - to feed him and keep him in expensive clothes. Oh, James had never asked about that before, it had never occurred to the man to ask how he was provided for, just that he was.

He thought about wonderful ways of hurting the man, he had done it before - it would take very little to slip back into the mindset of destroy rather then love. Adam had done rather horrible things to the older man when they first started out. He had single handedly destroyed his marriage, and if Adam pushed a bit more he could destroy his career also. He would have if Jimmy didn't leave his wife to be with him. Behind the charming smile and the rather innocent openness and humility, was a bitter man who was tired of not getting what he wanted.

Their relationship was stormy, filled with shouting matches and moments where he was sure that one of them was going to finally snap and kill the other one. Those moments, Adam truly questioned their compatibility - and there was more then one occasion in which he thought about walking out. He couldn't though, he could never bring himself to step out the door and walk away from it all. Maybe it was because he was too scared to go back to dating, to dealing with the bad dates and one night stands.

Maybe it was because of those periods of peace in their lives, when they were happy, when they lounged on the couch and ate take away while watching bad movies. When they would play ball with the girls in the park, or when they would make dinner together. In the middle of their fights, of the chaos, those memories were his port in the storm.

(444)

I am apparently a sucker for blue eyes.

2008-03-23T04:23:05Z

This morning, I woke up with Jimmy and I went down to make his breakfast, of course since his trip to the hospital things have gotten a little dull and tedious around here. Its hard to slow yourself down, especially when we were both so fast paced and intense individuals to begin with. Now that he has some sort of heart condition, we have to watch our diet and make sure he watches his blood pressure. While he worries about his heart, I have to worry about my bank account.

Still, we got a little gift on our back porch this morning, I only hope the poor thing doesn't drive me nutty - since I generally don't like dirty things. So, meet our new little girl, Norma Desmond. I love this picture (that's Heidi she's sitting on) it says to me: "Mr. De Millie, I am ready for my close up." Fucking psycho.

AU Fic - Lights, Camera, Action.

2008-03-20T04:18:56Z

Rating: NC-17. Naughty parts. More gay porn
Authors note: Why did I do this? Lord knows, but this is AU like a mother fucker. This is a young Adam, deserted the Legion and bumming around on the streets of New York. He's a rent boy, and if you don't know what that is, then you are no up on your gay word a day, and shame on you. This is part II
Word count: 1545

Adam did a few more scenes for Sal, simple things, with little to no plots. Blow jobs, anal sex, or just as a come rag. He was always passive in these scenes, he rarely ever got off, he was just too easy to use. Everyone wanted to fuck the blond Brit but no one wanted to get him off. Slowly Adam fell into this role as a submissive, batting long lashes up at the camera as some big stud came on his face or his ass.

The first full length film he was rolled in was the same picture in which he actually got off in. The “plot” was simple, Adam was the new boy who joined the football team. Of course in order to fully join the team he had to go through initiation, which was what everyone was watching the movie for in the first place.

Adam had grown complacent in his role in these movies, where he use to get nervous and anxious before the shoots, he now calm and apathetic. All he had to do was think about what he had to say and the paycheck at the end. He had buffed up a little bit more, and started to tan so he looked like the golden boy he was suppose to be. Like most of the men at the studio he had started waxing, leaving him mostly hairless except for a little treasure trail from his belly button down to his groin. What hadn’t changed was the drinking before the filming – he still couldn’t do it completely sober, he found that being straight he worried too much about how he was position and what he was doing to be any good at all.

When the first scene was ready, he pulled on his jersey and put on sneakers, before gathering with the group of men in the “locker room.” The cameras stared rolling and they shuffled into their places, and Brad started speaking. The whole premises was that in order to join the team Adam had to show all of them how dedicated he was to them. Adam did a brilliant part of playing the naïve boy, eager to show all of them just how dedicated he was, he would do anything, really – he just wanted to be apart of the team. The whole script was pretty ludicrous, but Adam gave up a long time ago in trying to make the dialog a bit more realistic, no one cared – they just wanted to see the blond get a face full of come.

The four other men (there was only four, not the usual number, other wise the film would have lasted hours and Adam was pretty sure he would have died.) lined up and started to undo their pants. Adam balked at the sight and took a step back, protesting that he wasn’t into that kind of stuff. Brad growled again that they weren’t fags, it was just a blow job, everyone did it – especially in the team and if he didn’t then he could kiss his place on the team good bye. In all reality Adam would have had to be convinced just a bit more, but this was a movie and it wasn’t his job to be convinced.

He had sucked each man off before, in different scenes, but doing them each, one after another was a little intimidating – they weren’t small men. He started with the dark haired man first, his eyes closing as he pretended to hesitate, before his lips wrapped around his dick and he started to suck. He could taste flesh, the faint flavor of the fruit lube that he had used to get hard, something Adam found amusing but appreciated since it forced him to take him down, swallowing around him as the man moaned above him. Each man got off, their come splashing over his hair, his cheek and chin. By the time he had got to Brad, the last one, he was a mess, his cheeks flushed, his body shaking and his jeans painfully tight.

In front of Brad, he could hear the men around him jerking each other off in order to get hard again for the next scene. Brad took the longest, it always did, he loved to perform for the camera, pulling out of Adam’s mouth and rubbing his cock against the boy’s face. He would tease and call him names, tug on his hair and fuck his mouth until Adam’s blue eyes pleaded with him to come. Only when he was good and ready did he finally get off, spraying Adam’s face while he held his hair in a tight grip, his other hand around his cock, making sure he was completely empty.

Adam’s jaw ached, and he took deep breaths, trying to relax and catch his breath once more. Once he was done and could talk normally, he stood up, and wiped his face off with his jersey, asking in a shaky voice if that’s all they needed – if he had proved how dedicated he was. The men laughed and the dark haired man grabbed him, pulling his shirt up and off, while the two other undid his jeans, pushing them down to get him naked. Brad surveyed him, watching him with a critical eye, his head cocked to the side as he walked over to Adam to stroke him a few times. The blond groaned, writhing in the grip of the man who held him, his eyes closing as he blushed at his own need.

Brad asked him, twice if he wanted to get off – it took the second time before he finally nodded yes. The men laughed and pushed him back to the wall. Wrapping leather cuffs around his wrists, the hung him up on the hook in the wall so he had no use of his hands and could only watch as they took turns blowing him. It was amazingly difficult not to just come, but to let four other men suck on him until the director decided it was enough. When he came he let out a shout, spraying a little bit on each man’s face, eager mouths open to receive him – his body shook and he whined softly – his head back against the wall, his blinks slow and sluggish.

Once he had gotten off he asked to be let down, he didn’t want to do this any more, why couldn’t he just be on the team now? Brad laughed, and dismissed the three other men, licking his lips he looked over at Adam, his hands grabbing the blonds hips and turning him around so his ass was out. No, not yet, he had to make sure Adam was tight enough for the team, everyone had to get fucked, it was the Captain’s privilege to use to the newbie as he saw fit and he wanted to fuck Adam until he begged him to stop.

His forehead against the cool wall he moaned as Brad pushed inside of him, he was big, but Adam was slowly getting use to the men on the set. His chest rose and fell quickly as he was used, the first few thrusts were awkward, but after the initial roughness they both got use to each other. In fact, after awhile he didn’t have to fake his moans, they were real and he enjoyed himself immensely, arching his back and turning his head to look at the tall blond man fucking him. It was suppose to be impersonal, but Adam loved getting into it, moaning at how good it was, startling his co-starts out of their zone and making them falter. Sal loved it, and apparently so did the watchers of the videos.

Right before Brad was suppose to come, they stopped filming and Brad took off the condom he had been using. He pushed back into Adam for a few more strokes, and the camera started once again, letting Brad come in the boy’s ass with a low groan. Pulling back, he grinned, watching his come drip out of the younger man’s ass. His hand slid up Adam’s back and he kissed his shoulder, welcoming him to the team.

That was a wrap, there would be some editing done, and some re shoots later – but everything looked good. Adam was let down and told to wash up. Exhausted, he stumbled off to the shower and washed himself thoroughly. As soon as he felt clean enough to get out of the shower, he dressed and went right to Sal. The man had his money ready and counted it out before handing it over to the blond, telling him that he had done a good job to day. Adam said nothing but took the money and nodded, he was going to go out and get wasted, hopefully that would get rid of the taste of dick in his mouth.

For muse_shuffle March disk 2, track 8

2008-03-19T03:48:31Z

Rating: NC-17. Naughty parts.
Authors note: Why did I do this? Lord knows, but this is AU like a mother fucker. This is a young Adam, deserted the Legion and bumming around on the streets of New York. He's a rent boy, and if you don't know what that is, then you are no up on your gay word a day, and shame on you.
Word count: 1842

I know I dreamed you a sin and a lie >> I have my freedom but I don’t have much time >> Faith has been broken, tears must be cried >> Let’s do some living after we die -- Rolling Stones, Wild Horses.

He was down to his last can of soup, how depressing was that? A lone can of generic soup in a expansive cupboard that held nothing but dust. Adam’s stomach growled and he put a hand over it as if to shut it up. The pressure of his hand did very little to stifle the growling and the pain that came from his hunger. Picking up the can of soup, he turned it over in his hand to make sure it was still good, fuck, even if it was bad he would still eat it – he was that desperate.

He opened the can and dumped it into a pot before putting it on the stove – he would have used the microwave but he had sold it two weeks ago in order to keep the landlord happy. Glancing around the dingy, and bare apartment he wondered what was the use, the place was a shit hole and, if the pile of notices on the end table were any indication – it was soon to be a cold shit hole. They were going to turn the heat off, and he was two weeks away from losing his electric too.

Sighing, he rubbed his face, and stirred the soup so it wouldn’t burn – that would just be the topping to his shit day. Shifting from one foot to another he glanced over at the card he had put on the counter next to him. He knew that card was meant for desperate measures, going out on “dates” with older men in order to get a good meal or a nice set of clothes was one thing – but this was another. Picking up the phone and calling the number would be reaching the point of no return. No going back after that, just the last nail in the coffin that would seal his fate as a rent boy.

He gave himself till the end of “dinner.” If he couldn’t figure out another way to make money, or to get something to eat he would call the name on the card.

Dinner went much too fast for his liking, and by the time the bowl was licked clean he hadn’t come up with a thing. Looking down at the empty bowl, he paused for a moment before setting it aside and picking up the card. He shoved it into his back pocket and walked to the bathroom to make himself presentable. Once his hair was combed and his face shaved, making him look young and fresh again, he dug around in his coin jar to find a quarter.

Down at the pay phone, he punched in the digits and put the phone to his ear. Closing his eyes he listened to the phone ring, hoping that no one would pick up. Of course, someone did, and he explained his situation to the voice on the other end. He was a friend of Sal, and he needed work, he would do anything, just as long as it paid cash. The voice laughed, a dark, foreboding chuckle, and gave Adam the address he was suppose to go to in order to get work and hung up.

The address was for an old factory that had been converted into lofts, there were a few people loitering outside, and as soon as Adam approached a man – he pointed up to a red, unmarked door. Taking a deep breath, he yanked open the door and stepped up into the dark stairwell.

He wasn’t expecting what he found, a rather clean looking office with chairs and a receptionist with a phone glued to her ear. When she saw Adam, she smiled and pointed to a seat, he sat down and waited for Sal to come out. He didn’t have to wait long, he shook the man’s hand and was ushered back into the man’s office. Adam was given the once over, the cigar puffing man making sure he was just the right look for what he was going for.

Sal was doing a series, of straight guys sucking queer dick – he thought it was wonderful and apparently fags ate it up. Of course no one knew that both of the actors were gay to begin with, just one had to act straight. Sal thought Adam would be perfect for the role, after he made the boy strip to make sure he had no piercings. The tattoo was iffy, but since he would have a sweatshirt on, no one would know.

So Adam was given an NYU sweatshirt and a beer and told to act like a drunken frat boy. Since Adam was itching to get drunk and hardly eaten anything anyway, it wouldn’t be a problem. He was put in a living room type setting, apparently this was to be the “frat” house, and across from him was a boy that looked to be his age, maybe a little younger – he had dirty brown hair and a great smile. If they weren’t about to do porn, Adam could have gone for him. Everything was shot from web cameras in the ceiling; this made it appear as if this was a set up, a dirty trick to play on heterosexuals.

Somewhere, in between the second or third beer, Adam was to admit (in a slurred way) that he had always wanted to know what it was like – you know, man, to suck a dick. The other man was suppose to smile suggestively and spread his legs, offering to let Adam try. Sliding down on to his knees, Adam knelt between his legs and unzipped his jeans, and looked up at the other boy. For a moment, he felt like it was his first time, his fingers shook and he blinked slowly against the beer that was making it hard to think. He tried to forget that there was a camera hidden in the boy’s glasses so the whole word would be able to watch his fumbling attempts to suck cock for the first time.

“Please don’t tell anyone.” He spoke softly, evoking a moan from the boy in front of him. Fingers slid through Adam’s blond hair, as he was promised that no one would ever know what he did. Nodding, as if that was good enough, Adam began his task, moaning as he slid the dick in and out of his mouth. Lips wrapping tight around the other man’s prick, causing him to moan and to buck up into Adam’s mouth, whispering about what a good cock sucker he was. Adam was no fool, he knew how good his mouth was, and he silently prided himself on his ability to get any man off with his mouth.

Opening his eyes, he stared up at the camera he knew was hidden in the thick black frames even as he took more into his mouth. Letting everyone get a good look at him, fuck all those old queens, hidden away behind computer screens jerking off to something they would never get. Closing his eyes he worked a bit harder before he had the other man warning him that he was going to come, he pulled back and used his hand to finish him off. Opening his mouth he caught most of the spay of come in his mouth, the rest splashing over his chin and nose.

Licking himself clean, he wiped the rest off with the back of his hand, and then gave a grin to the boy who was panting in the seat in front of him. “Did I do okay?” He asked sheepishly, feigning innocence, eager to know if he did well. All the camera man could do was nod, and whimper, his fingers sliding through Adam’s hair weakly.

Once the cameras were off, Adam stood and adjusted himself – dizzy with the lights and the knowledge of what he just did. He staggered away from the set and to the bathroom that was set aside for staff. He threw up, the soup, the beer and the come that he just had to swallow – his body shaking as he expelled it all. In retrospect, it was probably due to the fact that he had nothing but soup and beer to eat, and he was nervous as fuck. Still, he felt embarrassed, like he couldn’t hold his own in a set filled with perverts and deviants who couldn’t get real jobs.

Cleaning himself off, he took a deep breath and finally stepped back on to the set, looking around for what he should do next. Sal wrapped an arm around him and grinned, telling him he had done a fucking great job. Of course Sal used the adjective ‘fucking’ to describe almost everything, so Adam wasn’t too impressed. He was impressed when he was handed over his pay, all in cash, and the offer to do more.

Sal promised he would start off slow, one on ones, and then maybe some full length pieces where he would be one of the main characters. As long as Adam kept looking young and fit he would always have a job here, the money would only get better too, Sal whispered. All these promises, painting him an image of a life better then the one he was living. Queers loved his look, loved his accent, he could make a killing.

Still, Adam hesitated, not sure if he wanted to walk down this path – looking around at the bored actors and crew he wondered if that would be him in five years. When the novelty of a blow job wore off, when things had to get harder and odder to get him aroused and excited. But he needed to eat, and he swore to himself that he would only do this until he got a real job, and so, when he promised Sal to come tomorrow – the sleazy old man grinned and slipped him an extra hundred dollars.

Walking out of the building, he took a deep breath and tried to ignore the dirty used feeling that crept over him. It was something he was use to, but had always fought with the use of beer. Slowly sobering up, he was faced with the fact that he had just blown a man on video, what if someone he knew saw him? He almost turned back, to run up the stairs and to beg Sal not to show what he had done – almost, until he felt his fingers collide with the money in his pocket.

Fuck it, he was going to get something to eat.

Nat King Cole || (I love you) For Sentimental Reasons

2008-03-16T18:07:28Z

After the massive fight, that somehow did not end up coming to blows, and the trip to the hospital, Adam was more then ready for a normal day. Filled with low sodium, and low fat meals, and everything else the doctor ordered. Adam took the opinion (as he often did) that there was nothing one couldn't do if they didn't continue to push and work at it. This served him well in the Legion, and now it would serve him well when it came to taking care of Jimmy. As for the DEA, he had no idea what he was suppose to do with that. So he decided to play the Piano.

Rp fic - Sleeplessness

2008-03-15T21:53:20Z

Rating: PG-13, Language
Authors note: This is a fic in the series I have been writing with jimmydeakins mun. An AIM rp. This is set a number of years ago when both muses are teenagers. This only has baring on the current plot line that I share with jimmy's mun.
Word count: 900

Adam didn’t sleep well that night, well, he slept well for about two hours before he rolled over and opened his eyes – startled awake for no real reason. He knew he had slept two hours because when he rolled over he was facing the digital clock on the night stand next to the bed, its red face glowing ominously in the dark. Closing his eyes, he tried to go back to sleep, he needed to sleep, he wanted to sleep – the day had left him anxious and frustrated. It made him feel his age; all of a sudden he was acutely aware of the fact that he was hold. He could see the wrinkles around his eyes, the droop at the corner of his lips – and of course the ears that always stuck too far out of his head.

He tried to ignore the reason all of this was brought on, but he couldn’t. It was like high school all over again, Jimmy with his smile and star status, boys and girls flocking around him as if he was a high school messiah. Adam in the background his hands in his pockets, watching everything going on with muted jealousy. He knew he was never very handsome, not in the way that Jimmy was, or any of the other boys on the team, who all had that natural ease and charming smile that even made his heart flutter some times. Adam was a runt, and he knew it, and even when Jimmy left he still felt weighted down by some invisible anxiety, and demand to be as good as the others around him.

Showing up in the Legion forced him to be something he always wanted to be, it was a chance to reinvent himself. He gave himself a new name, and a new body. He worked hard to be something better then what he had been in High school, what he had seen in other boys. In the end, he left eleven years of training, strong and confident, more secure in himself and his sexuality then he had been in all his life. He felt powerful and better then anything he had seen back when he was in high school, a nice paying job and various flings in the following years only added to that power.

His ego took its first blow from David, who treated him like crap and then ran away just when he thought things had gotten better. He never truly recovered, but allowed himself various crutches to make himself feel better. Whenever anything made him doubt himself he usually turned to the same therapies as before. This included a long work out, a massage by Chad the closet case therapeutic masseuse who secretly liked it when Adam took his shirt off, or groaned at a particularly good rub. A quick trim and shave before meeting up with his friends for lunch. Tony and Gary had once tried to woo Adam, but during the course of a few dates ended up becoming more friends then anything else, the two men had known each other in College and also dated briefly before deciding to follow other paths. Their lunches were at least once a month and consisted of talking about business, and then, after a few drinks the more lurid details of their sex lives.

Usually reserved Adam enjoyed listening to the two men brag and then complain about the men in New York, never one to be out done Adam would throw his own stories into the mix and the subsequent laughter or sympathy would always make him feel better. Today was no exception, Tony and Gary listened with morbid fascination about the threesome that ended up being a peep show. While Gary thought the whole thing sounded hot, Tony insisted that he could never do it. In the end, they understood where Adam was coming from, but pointed out that he had no reason to be upset at Jimmy, since Adam had given permission. It was just his ego that had suffered from the experience.

That certainly didn’t mean that shopping for something beautiful and outrageously expensive wasn’t out of the question. Tony insisted on coming along, and kept Adam company as he perused through suits and various pieces of clothing that suddenly made him feel so much better. He bought a brown suede jacket for himself and a pair of loafers before he started seeing things that Jimmy would like, or things that he would like to see on Jimmy. Tony rolled his eyes as Adam bought the dress shirts and ties he picked out, informing the blond that he was very gay man’s wet dream. Who goes on retail therapy to buy things for other people? Adam just laughed and shrugged, promising to spend more money on himself for his birthday which was coming up in a few weeks.

Tony rolled his eyes at that too.

Purchases in hand, he kissed Tony good bye and told him that he would call him later that week. With a better out look on life, he took his gifts and went home, ready to start supper.

Rp Fic - At the Drive in

2008-03-15T21:37:43Z

Rating: NC-17 for sexual content.
Authors note: This is a fic in the series I have been writing with jimmydeakins mun. An AIM rp. This is set a number of years ago when both muses are teenagers. This only has baring on the current plot line that I share with jimmy's mun.
Word count: 1480

They did, eventually leave the house. It was only after they had both gotten off once again, and all they could do was lay on Jimmy’s bed panting and sweating as their teenage bodies came down from their orgasm highs. Daniel dozed a little, as did Jimmy, fingers touching as they laid apart, too hot to truly press together.

After they had both showered and dressed again, they decided that they were starving. It was getting a bit dark as they drove to the liquor store and then to the drive in. There they met up with some of their team mates, Jimmy jumped right in with the group, boys he had known from grade school. He introduced Daniel and soon the blond felt accepted enough to join in with the laughter and jokes. The group got burgers and fries, and sat around making comments about the cars and the girls that passed.

Daniel was silent though, keeping to himself as he ate, while Jimmy continued to make good on his word. Innocent touches and pats on the back were beginning to arouse Daniel once again. What looked like friendly touching to the outside world, was made more intimate with the knowledge of the last two days the boys had shared. By the time Daniel was on his second burger, he was desperate to touch the older boy, to have some contact other then the friendly pats on his ass and thigh.

Jimmy didn’t seem to sense the growing need, or if he did he just ignored it, driving with the group to the liquor store – where the boys hung out with the other athletes from the school. Their laughter and drinking went ignored by the local police, the boys usually were behaved enough not to cause a huge scene or get too sloppy so the law chalked it up to “boys being boys.” Daniel lent against the hood of Jimmy’s car, hands in the pockets of his jeans as he watched the Captain goof around with his team mates. He had a natural ease, when he laughed everyone else did too, his charm was apparent and his smile contagious. He watched the boys saddle up to him to get into his good graces, and the girls swoon from afar.

After a few hours Jimmy pulled away from the group and approached Daniel, he handed him some money and came real close, grinning like he always did as he spoke softly. Telling him to go across the street and get what they needed from the drug store. His grin widened when he saw the uncomfortable look cross Daniel’s face, if he didn’t do it, the older boy informed him, then he wouldn’t touch him later tonight.

Swallowing his fear he crossed the street and went into the store, his purchase was made in haste, his cheeks red the whole time as the drug store clerk grinned from ear to ear. Telling Daniel to be safe and have fun, the boy jogged from the store, mortified that he had just bought condoms. At least the clerk didn’t suspect it was for him and another boy.

Returning, Jimmy waved to the group saying he had to run a few errands and might meet them up at Tom’s house later that night. Of course he had no intention to do so but that stopped any questions that might have come from the early departure. Daniel showed his partner the condoms and the KY he had bought, explaining that maybe it wouldn’t hurt as much if there was a little lube.

Driving off in silence, Daniel found it was hard to sit still, aching to reach over and grab the older boy, kissing him and taking what he had been wanting the whole night. They drove far into the country, to an outlook over the city, it was a spot far away from the normal make out spot, where they might be spotted. As soon as they were parked, Daniel lent over and started kissing Jimmy, they touched each other over the console between them. Daniel’s hand on the crotch of the other boy’s jeans, massaging him as they groaned and panted hotly, releasing all the tension from the previous hours.

Pulling back, he undid Jimmy’s jeans, licking his lips as he told the boy how much he wanted to suck him off, how good he would make him feel. Jimmy’s erection was thick and hot, and Daniel whimpered at the first taste, his tongue swirling around the head before taking more of him into his mouth. The hand on the back of his head only encouraged him to take him deeper, his lover’s groans let him know he was doing the right thing. A few times Daniel got over zealous and nearly choked on the dick in his mouth, causing him to back off, his eyes watering. When his teeth pressed a little too hard, Jimmy yelped and Daniel gave him an apologetic smile.

Despite all the bumps and the mistakes, Daniel was getting better, and Jimmy relaxed, thrusting up into the hot eager mouth that took him down. Even though Jimmy gave sufficient warning to his orgasm, Daniel continued to suck and rub at him, he wanted to taste the older boy and, after a few strokes was rewarded with a mouth full of come. He swallowed a bit of it before making a face and spitting the rest out of the car window. It was a taste he was going to have to get use to.

Sitting back in their respective seats, they both cracked open beers and drank them in silence before Jimmy turned the radio on. Once they made it half way through their beers, they started kissing once again, this time the sandy haired boys hand ventured to Daniel’s crotch rubbing him through the denim. When Daniel stopped him and explained that he wanted to be taken like before, Jimmy grinned. Informing him that it might take awhile since he needed to get hard once more.

They moved to the back, kicking jimmy’s baseball things out of the way so they had more room to touch each other in. Daniel could smell the dust and the old sweat of the car as he laid back against the seat and allowed Jimmy to climb on top of him. They ground against each other, groaning in between hot kisses, Daniel throbbing in his briefs as Jimmy slowly started to respond. By the time Jimmy had another beer, Daniel was nearly begging to be fucked, doing everything he could to the other boy to get him hard enough to want to pound him.

In the tight space of the back seat there were fumbles and curses as Daniel got naked, and Jimmy pushed his pants and boxers to his knees. With a little more knowledge then before, and help from lube and condom, their only hindrance was the lack of space. As Jimmy pushed forward, Daniel pushed back, his cheek against the back of the seat as he took the cock with only a little whimpering and wincing. Whatever the pain, the reward was so good he hardly noticed.

The windows started to fog as both bodies started to heat up, Jimmy’s thrusts were short and fast in order to accommodate the small space they were in. Both had to stop and adjust themselves in order to properly fit in the back seat the car. Daniel’s leg slid off the seat and to the floor, spreading himself open and keeping himself up so his lover could get deeper. As Jimmy sped up, Daniel moaned louder, his fingers grabbing the suicide bar on the ceiling so his face wouldn’t keep smashing into the plastic that covered the side of the car.

They both lasted longer this time, Jimmy panting and growling as he watched the younger boy writhe and beg to get fucked harder, faster. When he couldn’t last any longer he exploded into the condom, his hand reaching around to touch Daniel’s cock, causing him, like before to explode with a low moan. Sweaty, and exhausted, both collapsed against the seat and gasped for breath in the humid car, the heat was unbearable, and when Jimmy threw away the condom, he rolled the window down to let in some air.

Naked, they both settled in the back seat – alone with their beer and the soft music from the radio. As Jimmy wrapped an arm around the young boy, Daniel smiled, knowing that at last, he had found someone that truly understood him, that could make him feel like no other person had made him feel before.

For the_bigshow 2.7 - 1.C Children

2008-03-15T19:49:17Z

Given my propensity to fuck men, and the fact that unless you are in an Arnold Schwarzenegger film, men can't have babies. I would say the likelihood that I would ever reproduce is slim to none. Sometimes, this fact actually bothers me. I know my mother would like to have grandchildren. All of her brothers and sisters have grandchildren, and great grandchildren - but not her. So she lives vicariously through her siblings and Gene's children who she had met numerous times.

I have thought about adopting, usually it involves a trip out to mum's and spending most of the day listening to how well my cousins are doing. I was inches away once, when I was back down in French Guyana. The people are so amazingly poor down there, sometimes I wish I could give the children a better life. Still, I think I would make a good father. I am patient, and slow to anger, not to mention I am financially secure.

So I could always do it the old fashioned way, jerk off into a cup and then pay someone to get knocked up by me and then take the child when its born. Honestly though, I wonder how smart it would be for me to pass on any of my genetic material. I am not very book smart, and if homosexuality is genetic - it seems unfair to pass that on to some little boy or girl. I am not saying that I hate being gay, it's just not a very easy lifestyle. Not something I would want to pass on to someone I love.

Plus, Jimmy has three girls of his own - and probably isn't looking to add on to his pack. I can be content with being a semi-parent to three very wonderful girls. Even if they think I talk funny.

(324)

Tenspot Universe, teaching lesson for i_dontdosubtle

2008-03-15T03:27:38Z

The loft was wide open, dark wooden floors, with floor to ceiling windows that made up one wall. A piano was the main focal point of the living area, against the window wall and surrounded by black leather over stuffed couches. Directly opposite of the wall was a queen sized bed, covered with a soft down comforter and flanked on either side by night stands.

A long counter blocked off the massive kitchen, right next to the bathroom. Everything was clean, pristine, and Spartan, it was a lot like Adam's time in the Legion, sans bugs and the oppressive heat. Adam was sipping a glass of scotch, leaning against the counter he muddled over the idea of meeting someone he barely knew. Still, it had been a long time - what could it hurt?

With a sigh he licked his lips and went to sit down on the couch, sitting back, his eyes closing.

This is of course a separate rp and universe, not tied to any pre-established rp.